


I Was Probably Deluding Myself, Anyway

by AndiMackmeetsHeathers



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-05-02 06:17:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19193401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndiMackmeetsHeathers/pseuds/AndiMackmeetsHeathers
Summary: After Costume Day, Cyrus begins to doubt that TJ ever had feelings for him in the first place."You hurt me last Friday, TJ. Really badly."TJ found his eyes watering up."I'm sorry.""I was probably deluding myself, anyway."With that, Cyrus was gone. TJ felt as though he had lost the only person he could talk to like this the love of his life, and the only good thing in it-forever.





	I Was Probably Deluding Myself, Anyway

**Author's Note:**

> Hi I am so so sorry for being a little inactive until fairly recently but I hope you enjoy this! It's probably short and rushed, but it's my take on the leaked lines. I know the original is from the finale but I liked this dynamic and thought it worked. Also I'm sorry that it uses a swear word, but it's only one!

"So then I said to Amber that even though her anger was related to Jonah and how things were slowly breaking between them, was there something else going on? She opened up about her home life and I won't get it in to it but believe me, it's not fun. As for her and Jonah- Cyrus? Cyrus?" 

Andi snapped her fingers in front of Cyrus' face. 

"Cyrus, were you even listening?" 

Cyrus studied Andi's face. She looked upset that he didn't seem to care about what she was talking about. It wasn't that, Cyrus mused. He cared deeply about the lives of his friends, including Andi, including who she'd been talking about. Including Buffy, who was sat in the booth opposite of them next to Marty, at that awkward point where they were friends, but in the verge of more. It was truly a shame Marty had a girlfriend. They had so much chemistry, and would be so cute together. 

Anyway. Off task. Andi had been talking to him and Cyrus realised with a blush that everyone had been glancing at him expectantly for the past ten seconds. Cyrus scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, silence hanging over him like the one which had been obstructing his mood recently. 

But this wasn't about him. It was about Andi. Cyrus was usually a good listener. What had gotten into him recently? 

Cyrus faltered. 

"Sorry, Andi. I never meant to be rude. It's just..." Cyrus sighed heavily. Why was it so easy to listen to others open up, yet so hard to open up himself? "My mind has been a little occupied recently..." 

Over the past seven days, to be more precise.

Buffy and Andi shared a knowing look and Marty looked to Buffy for an explanation in his confusion. When he wasn't given one, he simply shrugged and muttered 'girls'. Andi rolled her eyes and the comment also earned him a punch in the shoulder from Buffy and a grin from across the table from Cyrus.

Cyrus was just as confused as Marty was. Did the girls know why he was so upset? Had they caught on and figured out his feelings for TJ by now? He felt an overwhelming sense of alarm tighten around his chest like a vice as he reminded himself he was falling for a straight boy again. 

TJ liked Kira. And why wouldn't he, after all? She was pretty, and friendly, and they both had basketball in common. Cyrus, on the other hand, felt sd though he could give TJ nothing. TJ was probably a pity friend, then dumped him the moment he fell for a girl. But tjis was inevitable. Cyrus thought he was special, in TJ's eyes, if nobody elses. Turns out, he was special and important to nobody; not even his own best friends. He was a loser, and pathetic. He was annoying and judgmental, according to TJ. Of course he was. TJ was right, and who could blame him for choosing Kira over Cyrus for that reason? Cyrus had to just grow up already and accept that he was always going to be second best in everybody's eyes. 

This whole TJ situation was destined to be a disaster, so it was honestly for the best if Buffy and Andi decided to not get involved. 

Buffy was the one who broke the awkward silence that ensued. She leaned forward from across the table and took Cyrus' hands, squeezing them gently.

"Cyrus, we're always there for you. And we believe on you. You didn't deserve to be stood up by one of your closest friends. No-one does, obviously, but you're one of the best people I know, if not the best person, and if anybody deserves it less, it's you, Cyrus Goodman. Got it?" 

Cyrus shrugged, his gaze intently focused on the floor suddenly, as though his trainers were the most interesting thing he'd ever seen in his entire life. He was ashamed of the way he'd trusted TJ so much, only to be humiliated and have it all thrown back in his face. 

Andi, meanwhile, nodded along enthusiastically in response to what Buffy was saying.

"Cyrus, you're so important to us and if you're not important enough to keep promises with and communicate properly with, then he's not worth it. We're just true g to protect you here. You are such a great guy and he's been such a douchebag. Forget about him." 

"I think that will be kind of difficult." Cyrus muttered, deliberately not maintaining eye contact with anyone on the table. 

"Oh? And why's that?" Buffy asked Cyrus, sympathetically. 

"It's difficult to ignore him when I have a crush on him, isn't it?" 

Cyrus didn't fully comprehend what he had said until after the words had exited from his mouth. Did he reply just admit to having a crush on TJ? He knew he should be embarrassed, or shocked or whatever you're supposed to be feeling after accidentally admitting to a crush, but he genuinely felt nothing at this point.

Buffy grabbed Cyrus' hand.

"Cyrus!" Andi exclaimed softly.

Cyrus gave her a small smile.

"You like...TJ?" 

Cyrus could almost see the cogs working in Buffy's brain.

Buffy frowned. 

"Huh. That actually makes a lot of sense."

"It does?!" 

Cyrus thought he'd been discreet about his crush. What if TJ knew? Cyrus felt weak all of a sudden at the concept of TJ discovering that Cyrus had a crush on him and politely rejecting him.

Both girls nodded. Cyrus placed his head in his hands despairingly. 

"Great." Cyrus muttered sarcastically. "Just what I needed." 

"You'll be fine." Andi placed a hand on his shoulder lightly. "I promise."

Cyrus felt anything but fine. His palms were sweaty and he was certain he'd become as pale as a ghost. Tears began to fill his eyes, but Cyrus dragged his arm across his eyes determinedly to prevent the flow. 

"But, the thought of telling anyone else..." 

More specifically, TJ Kippen himself.

"You don't have to." Buffy interjected. "But he's your friend and has the right to find out eventually." 

Cyrus nodded slowly. He owed that to TJ, at least, of nothing else. There could be a subtle sign he could use to indicate his feelings towards TJ one day, if TJ Oblivious Kippen actually picked up on them, anyway. 

Marty, meanwhile, had only just managed to comprehend what Cyrus had explained to them.

"Wait, Cyrus, you're gay?" 

All three members of the Good Hair Crew face palmed in perfect synchronization with each other. 

"Dude. How did you not notice?" 

Marty shrugged and continued sipping casually from his chocolate milkshake.

"I dunno." 

Buffy shook her head. 

"So, that's why you were so upset on Costume Day last Friday?" Andi confirmed. 

"Yep." 

He felt as deflated as he sounded. 

"It all makes sense now." Buffy reaffirmed. Her and Andi explained the signs of him liking TJ. 

"I just hope he's not with her now, but I'm scared it's too late." Cyrus mumbled, his head low. 

His friends tried to comfort him, albeit to no avail whatsoever. As everyone left, he wondered when he'd next see TJ again, if at all. Cyrus hoped desperately it would go well. 

Little did Cyrus Goodman know, he would soon be proven wrong.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
TJ was feeling miserable, to say the least. It was a Saturday, and it had been eight days since Costume Day. He missed Cyrus more than he ever knew he could, and that really spoke volumes about how much his heart ached. 

"Kippen, watch out!" 

TJ dodged out of the way nimbly, feeling entirely complacent about the sport that he was so passionate about. Yes, he still loved basketball, but Cyrus hated him, so he began to hate himself and it had filled up his mind recently.

What he had done was inexcusable. But what if Kira had outed him to the school? What then? What would Cyrus think? Cyrus would probably politely reject him, and TJ didnt know if he could handle the heartbreak. But it wasn't just that, of course.

He didn't want to be outed against his will-who did?-when he was still coming to terms with his sexuality. He knew he was gay, but he didn't want other people knowing it. It would probably tarnish his reputation as captain of the basketball team. His team would turn against him.

And of course, there was the homophobic attacks and comments he'd receive. It was too much to handle for him. But he also didn't want this blow to hit Cyrus. If people suspected that Cyrus was gay, they could abuse him, too. Cyrus was the last person to deserve any pain, whatsoever, whether physical or emotional. When Cyrus was in pain, TJ was too. 

That was the main source of his misery. Cyrus had been looking forward to this, to do something fun with him, and TJ had to go and throw it all away. He was being selfish, though. He needed to consider how Cyrus was feeling, too. 

How was he holding up? Was he alright? Did he genuinely care about TJ enough to be upset? He certainly looked it, on Costume Day last Friday. TJ couldn't erase the image of Cyrus, looking st him as though he were a stranger, or perhaps not the person he thought he was. Either way, waves of guilt overcame TJ, and he found himself struggling to breathe, before realising that probably wasn't great in a basketball game. 

TJ snapped out of it, stealing the ball, throwing it to a team mate, running forward. His team mates three it to each other, avoiding the opposing team, until it got to TJ, near the net. With one throw, the ball effortlessly glided in. 

Just like that, his team mates were hugging and cheering, chanting his name. Despite it only being a game played in the park and not actually an official game, the teams were fiercely competitive. 

TJ couldn't bring himself to care, however. If Cyrus hated him, then how could he ever possibly be happy? 

He thanked his team mates, patting them on the back and fist bumping them as he went. They were all gold friends, after all. 

One of them, Michael, seemed to noticed that there was something up with TJ, however. 

"Are you alright, man?" 

"Yeah, Michael, I'm fine, honestly. Just tired, you know how it is." 

Michael nodded, congratulating him again with a grin and running off in the opposite direction to go home. 

TJ sat down on a bench; he felt light headed and dizzy all of a sudden, as though he was going to faint. 

He had been say down in deep thought, feeling awful about how he'd treated Cyrus and hating himself for it for no more than ten seconds, when he spotted Kira approaching him. 

Great. Just what he needed.

"Kira, leave me alone please. I don't feel like talking to you right now." 

Kira set her face into a frown. 

"You're the one who's been ghosting me since Wednesday!"

"Well, you're the one who called Cyrus my weak, pathetic boyfriend for trying to talk to him! He's anything but that, Kira! He's the most amazing person, and probably the most amazing thing, left in my life! Yet now... he won't even talk to me." 

Kira went to put an arm on his shoulder, almost patronising in her nature. TJ jerked away from her violently. 

"TJ-" 

He rapidly interrupted her.

"Because of you, Kira. Because of you, Cyrus is ignoring me. Because of you, Cyrus hates me." 

TJ's voice wobbled and tears formed in TJ's eyes. 

"That wasn't me. It's your fault for not calling him. Your fault for not telling him you were going with someone else. Your fault for hurting him and letting him down." 

TJ stared at Kira blankly in shock. 

"How could you possibly have the audacity to say that? You literally manipulated me into doing a costume with you by implying that there was something wrong with being..." 

"You're struggling to say it, aren't you? Struggling to admit you're..." 

"Gay." TJ squeezed his eyes shut. "I'm gay and nothing will ever change that. I love Cyrus and nearly lost him once. Now, I'm close to losing him again." 

"TJ, look, I-" 

"Kira, listen to me. This isn't about you. And to be honest-one more push, and my relationship with the guy who me and the world to me will be gone forever. I don't know how I'll cope without him. His infectious laughter and adorable giggles, his beautiful smiles, his gorgeous eyes..." 

"Kippen, maybe-" 

"He's patient, kind and caring. He's a good listener and attentive. He never judges me, no matter what. He's so understanding and forgiving. He's really funny, too, and good fun to be around. When we meet at my lockers-well, more like met, now-or go to the spoon together or the park, he'd light up my day. You don't understand how it feels to lose that so abruptly, and frankly you probably never will." 

"I was doing you a favour that day." 

That was it. TJ had had enough. He snapped.

"A favour? A FAVOUR!? No, Kira! You blew any chance I would have had with Cyrus out of the water! You hurt him and you hurt me, too! Do you ever stop to think about other people's feelings? Do you ever have some empathy for once in your life, and put yourself in somebody else's shoes, wonder how you might make them feel? Do you ever think about how people feel? You can't manipulate people and use their sexualities against them. Don't you realise that? Cyrus and I aren't just some pawns in your stupid game of chess. We're real people with real emotions and you should know that by now." 

TJ took a deep breath before continuing his tirade.

"Yeah, I'm gay. Have a problem with it? Too bad! It's 2019 and people are much more accepting than they used to be. If you don't like it, you need to grow up, Kira. People are gay all around the world. If your small little twisted mind can't accept that, then you seriously need to grow up. The world can't adapt for you. You have to adapt for it. I'm sorry if that upsets you. That's just the truth." 

Kira's mouth dropped. She was gobsmacked that TJ had the daring to talk back to her when she'd kept his little secret for so long.

"You have some nerve, you know that? I could have spilled your secret to the whole school, but I didn't. I like getting what I want, and believe me when I say that I won't stop until I get my way." Kira growled. "Do you really think you ever had a chance with a pathetic little nerd like him? You'll only ever be truly be loved properly by a girl. Don't you understand that? Can't you see how much you're damaging your reputation?" 

TJ gritted his teeth, wishing he could slap her right now. However, he restrained himself. 

"Fuck that, Kira! My reputation means nothing to me compared to how much I care about Cyrus!" 

Kira shook her head. 

"You're not getting it, are you? You'd quickly lose your status and your position as the captain of the basketball team. Nobody would respect you. They'll hurt you, they'll be homophobic-" 

"You're being homophobic! What difference does it make?" 

"If you didn't care about your reputation, you wouldn't mind me spilling your secret to the school." Kira sneered.

"You wouldn't dare." 

Kira threw back her head and laughed, as if she wasn't ruining one of the most important relationships in TJ's life.

"Try me." 

TJ could feel himself shaking. His palms were becoming sweaty and his eyes seemed to be, too. He needed to get out of here-and fast. 

He got up to leave, but Kira grabbed his wrist, her grip surprisingly strong. 

"And where exactly do you think you're going, Kippen?: 

"Anywhere away from you." TJ snarled, before stumbling in the opposite direction to the swings, his tears blinding him the whole way. He was halfway there when he text Cyrus, hoping and praying this would work out.

He couldn't be more wrong. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Cyrus was surprised, to say the least, he had to admit. He was in the Spoon with Amber, talking through Costume Day with her. 

"If he chose her over you, then he's not worth it, believe me. It's his loss, Cyrus, not yours."

Cyrus had anticipated this kind of comfort from Amber. 

"Thanks, Amber." 

Amber smiled at him sweetly from across the table.

What he hadn't anticipated, however, was a text from TJ asking him to go to the swings as soon as possible because he was upset and he wanted to talk. He'd sent him tons of messages and called him numerous times since Costume Day. If only he'd done it then, and not now. Things might have been slightly different. 

But TJ had been proving he cared about Cyrus.. 

After approximately a minute's contemplation following Amber's departure (due to work related duties; her break was supposed to have finished five minutes ago), Cyrus finally relented and left The Spoon as fast as his legs would carry him, hoping it wouldn't be too late. He still loved him, after all, and could find it in his heart to forgive him.

TJ was pacing up and down frantically, approaching the swings and twisting the chains with his clammy hands.

What if Cyrus didn't turn up? What if Cyrus had decided he completely hated him? What if Cyrus changed his mind halfway there? 

What if Kira turned up, out of blue?

Wait, what? 

This girl was practically stalking him. It wasn't fair, TJ decided. 

As Kira approached him, she raised a perfect eyebrow in surprise. 

"I wouldn't expect you to be here of all places, Kippen." 

TJ shrugged, reiterating something he'd told Cyrus last Wednesday, albeit in a miserable tone. 

"I have layers." 

Kira smirked, folding her arms across her chest. 

"Is this not a bit...childish?" 

"It helps me when I'm feeling down. Cyrus introduced me to the swings." 

Kira chuckled.

"Of course he did." 

"Are you implying that there's something wrong with that?" TJ defended, jumping off the swings and walking towards the girl in what he hoped was in a somewhat intimidating way. 

"Relax, TJ." 

"No, I won't. You say all these awful things to me and then proceed to insult the one place I can go to when I'm feeling down, all stemming from something you've done! That's low, Kira. Even for you." 

"Yeah, well maybe not everything is so perfect in my life." Kira retaliated defensively. 

TJ swore he could see a glimmer of a tear in her eyes, and wondered fleetingly whether she was faking it for attention or not or not. He wouldn't put it past her, to be honest, after everything he'd gone through with her. 

But there was something hurt in the voice, the signs if a broken person needing to be fixed. TJ recognised those feelings well, having been through them himself. 

Perhaps Kira was more complicated as a person than she seemed, and TJ should give her a chance. 

TJ sighed and looked down, swinging higher. Kira looked to the swing next to him. 

"Is this swing taken?" 

"Actually, Cyrus should be arriving soon. I wanted to talk to him." 

"I'm sure he won't mind me swinging with you for a bit, will he?" 

"But this is kind of our place and our thing." TJ defended. "It's how we met. How our friendship started, and if you don't get off that swing it could he how it ends, so please get off it. I don't want to talk to you right now." 

"Nonsense. End a friendship over that? Really? And what if I apologised?" 

"It would have to be, like, the best apology ever." TJ mumbled, staring at his feet. 

The silence that followed felt awkward and weird. With Cyrus, it was never like that. 

TJ had an idea, suddenly. Maybe if he enjoyed swinging enough, it would make him happy. If he liked swinging with a girl, perhaps he could at least attempt to be straight. 

Perhaps was a weak word, but he'd take it.

"You're swinging petty high." Kira observed. "Bet you I can swing higher." 

At this point, TJ didn't even try to stop her.

"Go ahead."

TJ felt defeated, broken. But he could never let his weakness and vulnerability show. So, he played along, and pretty soon, they were swinging in perfect synchronization with each other.

Kira suggested jumping off together, and TJ obliged. Why had he done that? It was stupid. TJ felt like he was betraying Cyrus. They jumped off and TJ felt his hands scrape against the floor and winced. He felt guilty. When him and Cyrus were on good terms, everything was fine. But they weren't. 

And that hurt. A lot. It was his fault and he needs to apologise, but Kira was still here, and she thought this was funny. You had to admit it, on the floor at the swings. TJ needed to fit in, maybe he could try being straight, being normal, so he got up and laughed. Kira had been bad to him, but maybe one day he could forgive her? She was fun, and besides it's not like...

Cyrus was here. 

This couldn't be happening. 

Him and Kira had been swinging together, and Cyrus was looking at him like he'd just betrayed him. He was plane and wide eyes, and his hands seemed to shake. TJ moved towards him.

"Cyrus." 

He reached out to touch Cyrus' arm. 

"Don't touch me." Cyrus snapped. 

"Look, Cyrus, I-" 

"Why did you ask me here?" 

"Because I wanted to-" 

"Humiliate me? Prove you had a new friend?" 

"No, Cyrus, I swear it's nothing like that, I promise." 

"Then what is it, TJ? You tell me. What is it?" 

Cyrus felt sick with jealousy. TJ had text him. He wanted to talk. And Cyrus had foolishly taken the bait. How stupid of him. 

"Cyrus, it's not what it looks like. I came here and she followed me. I never asked her to." 

"Fun, though, wasn't it, Kippen?" Kira commentrd with a smirk. 

TJ could have slapped her. 

Cyrus felt like he'd been slapped in the face, hard. By a heavy object. 

"I thought this was our place. I thought this was our thing. I thought you were better than this. I was wrong." 

"No, you don't understand-" 

"That's right. I don't understand. I don't understand you, TJ Kippen. Everything you told me was a lie. The only person you can talk to like this? Yeah, right." 

"I meant what I said!" 

"No, TJ, you didn't mean that. You probably meant it when you called me annoying and judgemental, but not when you said that." 

"I never meant to hurt you." 

"I thought we were friends." 

"We are friends!" 

Cyrus could see TJ getting agitated, but he wasn't the one whose heart was being shattered into a million pieces. The one place they'd called their own, yet he'd been replaced. This incident made him doubt his friendships, doubt TJ's intentions. Doubt TJ was any different. 

"Were we ever?" 

"Of course we were." 

"Funny. Doesn't seen like it to me. You keep her saying me and hurting me time after time. I keep forgiving you. Fool me once, more fool you. Fool me twice, more fool me. Looks like I'm the fool, the loser, the one to laugh at. Is that all I meant to you?" 

"You're not even listening to me, Cyrus! You're misjudging the situation and putting words in my mouth! You need to stop being so stubborn and just hear my side of the story." 

Cyrus tried to blink back his tears. Didn't TJ comprehend how hurt and betrayed he felt? Or did he not have a shred of empathy left in his body? This was a mistake. TJ took the one thing personal to them, and shared it. He went behind his back with Kira, who he probably had feelings for, and it made him look idiotic and feel physically ill. 

"I don't need to. I've seen enough, already. I'm just second best to you-just like how I'm second best to everyone. I get it. You don't care about me." 

"Cyrus, you're not listening!" 

Cyrus shook his head. 

"You don't get to play victim here, TJ. You really don't."

TJ was mad now. 

"Cyrus, you have no idea. You don't understand." 

"That's right, I don't understand you, TJ Kippen. I'm starting to believe you're not the redeemed guy I thought you were." 

"Because you're letting your emotions blind you. You don't think this hurt me? That Kira didn't hurt me?" 

Kira went to say something, but Cyrus spoke over her loudly. 

"Rubbish. You don't know the half of it. I guess I'm just second best, like with everyone else. I thought you were different, that this was our special place and thing. I was wrong. About everything. About you. You've publicly humiliated me, gone behind my back and upset me. Do you have any idea what you're throwing away?" 

"Are you serious right now?" 

"You can be so oblivious, TJ Kippen, it's frustrating. I've always been treated like this and I've had enough. Looks like I'm the fool in this situation, the loser. The joker for you all to laugh at. I won't be some pawn swiped in a quick movement. I refuse to be. I'm a person with emotions and feelings too." 

"I really care about you. More than you know." 

"You have a funny way of showing it." 

"Cyrus-" 

"You messed up now, TJ, and you have to face the consequences." 

"You don't think I already am?" 

TJ did look upset, but he was completely clueless to what Cyrus had gone through. 

"I'm not some throwaway you can re-use. It hurts when you do stuff like this." 

"I'm hurt too, Cyrus! More than you'll ever know! " 

"Prove it." 

"Come on, Cyrus, be reasonable." 

"I am!" 

"You're not! If you so much as stopped for a second and used your head, you'd realise-" 

TJ cut himself off abruptly, aware of what he was about to admit and not quite ready to admit it yet . Cyrus crossed his arms across his chest furiously. 

"Realise what, TJ?" 

TJ's face softened. He look defeated, suddenly. Tired. Broken.

"Never mind. It doesn't matter." 

"Yeah, I get it. You're insinuating I don't matter to you." 

"You do!" 

"You took our thing and you ruined it! How am I supposed to react, TJ? Sit around and be complacent? Thanks to you, I have the confidence not to. But thanks to you, I'm upset enough to be having this argument with you." 

"Cyrus. Please listen to me." TJ pleaded, almost begging. He was desperate now. "We can talk this through." 

TJ looked lost, Cyrus thought to himself. Almost miserable. But maybe, for once, he deserved it. 

"No, we can't. This is on you, TJ. You need to learn that actions have consequences." 

"Yeah, like I haven't already."

Cyrus just glared at him sharply and TJ felt sick and dizzy with shame and guilt, but stood his ground all the same. How had everything gone so wrong? 

"This time, your mistakes have pushed you over the edge." 

"If you stopped being so stubborn and considered how I felt for once-" 

"You hypocrite. Do you ever have any sense of empathy for anyone else? I won't just be silenced and complacent, or second best, or a nobody, like I've been for so long. You don't even attempt to consider my emotions, you're too wrapped up in yourself-so why would I think about yours? It's selfish and wrong. I'm not a pawn in a chess game and I'm not someone you can just knock down and think it's alright again. You humiliated me and betrayed me, and this time, there's no forgiveness for you left in my heart." 

"We can work through this." 

"I don't think so. Not this time." 

"I want to be friends again. I want you to make me happy again and I want to make you happy again, like old times. Come on. Think about it." 

"You've gone too far, this time. I don't know if we can be, anymore. You have no idea what you put me through, TJ Kippen. You hurt me last Friday, TJ. Really badly." 

TJ found his eyes watering up.

"I'm sorry."

"I was probably deluding myself, anyway." 

TJ we confused. What did Cyrus mean by that cryptic comment? 

"Cyrus, wait-" 

TJ went to put his hand on Cyrus' wrist, but Cyrus jerked his hand away from TJ violently. 

"Don't touch me, TJ Kippen. You've done enough already, as it is."

"Underdog-" 

"Don't you dare 'underdog' me. I've had enough of me forgiving you repeatedly. This time, there is no forgiveness. You don't deserve it, nor do you deserve my time, nor my patience. I'm leaving. Have fun with your girlfriend." 

Cyrus practically spat the last word out. 

"She's not my-" 

"Whatever. I don't even care anymore. Goodbye, TJ Kippen, and good luck in life. I hope you make wiser decisions in the future. You've lost something here, TJ. It's your loss. I hope you treat others better than too be treated me. Don't try to contact me. I won't answer. You'll be wasting your time, the way I was wasting my time thinking you were different, that you were special. I was wrong and I hope it dawns on you eventually just how much you've let me down and betrayed me. Any way, I hope you do well in the future. Goodbye, TJ."

With that, Cyrus was gone. TJ felt crushed and totslly heatbroken, as though he had lost the only person he could talk to like this, the love of his life, and the only good thing in it-forever.

He had nothing left without Cyrus in his life. What had he done? 

It was too late. 

Cyrus was gone-forever, and the worst thing was, there was nothing he could do about it. 

He wasn't sure there ever would be. 

The truth was, he'd probably never see Cyrus Goodman ever again.

He wished he could change things, but he couldn't. 

Instead, he wept as he watched the light leave the park and wished he could be a better person. 

He could sure wish. And now, his favourite person was gone. 

Perhaps the worst thing wasn't that he couldn't do anything about it.

It was that it was all his fault.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments if you liked this!


End file.
